Thought i'd make a new forum game.

 

Post funny or 'wtf' realizations or paradoxes that you've come across or thought of!

 

I'll start.

 

 

This Statement is False

I know that I know nothing at all.

Edited March 27, 201511 yr by ccabal86

http://d2tq98mqfjyz2l.cloudfront.net/image_cache/1354109119997608.jpg

Oh and this one!

http://cdn.themetapicture.com/media/funny-paradox-question-riddle.jpg

Lol! Loving the responses! Ok, here's one.

 

 

Your mission is to not accept the mission. Do you accept?

http://i.imgur.com/dKxUI.jpg

The Opposite of Pro Is Con. Does that mean the opposite of progress is congress.

Not really a paradox but hillarious!

http://i.imgur.com/dKxUI.jpg

true

Answer truthfully (yes or no):

Will your next word be no?

 

http://i.imgur.com/dKxUI.jpg

true

 

I blame the proliferation of HR departments doing the hiring. If you don't have the right keywords, they will bypass you even if you're a viable candidate. That's why it's always good to ask if you can talk to members of the team. If they're working over 50 hours a week and you semi-know what you're talking about, they will demand that HR hire you.

 

Or you can search through your pro-social hobbies for both references and skill-sets. My marketing experience as a semi-indie writer has helped me fill out softer skills, while still letting me have fun at conventions.

 

Here's a paradox:

Man 1: "I major in art history." 

Man 2: "There's a lot of people that do that. What do you plan to do?"

Man 1: "Well, there's not a lot of actual jobs, but I think I'll continue into academia."

Man 2: "So, you plan to get a job teaching others a field that only allows them to directly compete with you for limited tenure positions."

Man 1: "Well, I'll have a phD and thousands of dollars in debt. That'll get me something"

Man 2: "I have a bachelors, no debt, and own a house."

Man 1: "Fuck you! I understand the overarching gestalt of post-impressionism."

Man 2: "Oh, I got that book, too. It fits really well in my library and gives me something to talk about at my art-appreciation meetups."

Man 1: "..."

Man 2: "And you're the smart one getting the phD."

Man 1: "I hate you."

 

 

http://i.imgur.com/dKxUI.jpg

true

 

I blame the proliferation of HR departments doing the hiring. If you don't have the right keywords, they will bypass you even if you're a viable candidate. That's why it's always good to ask if you can talk to members of the team. If they're working over 50 hours a week and you semi-know what you're talking about, they will demand that HR hire you.

 

Or you can search through your pro-social hobbies for both references and skill-sets. My marketing experience as a semi-indie writer has helped me fill out softer skills, while still letting me have fun at conventions.

 

Here's a paradox:

Man 1: "I major in art history." 

Man 2: "There's a lot of people that do that. What do you plan to do?"

Man 1: "Well, there's not a lot of actual jobs, but I think I'll continue into academia."

Man 2: "So, you plan to get a job teaching others a field that only allows them to directly compete with you for limited tenure positions."

Man 1: "Well, I'll have a phD and thousands of dollars in debt. That'll get me something"

Man 2: "I have a bachelors, no debt, and own a house."

Man 1: "Fuck you! I understand the overarching gestalt of post-impressionism."

Man 2: "Oh, I got that book, too. It fits really well in my library and gives me something to talk about at my art-appreciation meetups."

Man 1: "..."

Man 2: "And you're the smart one getting the phD."

Man 1: "I hate you."

 

 

 

This is very true about HR departments

To be born is to be handed a death sentence.

 

 

 

http://i.imgur.com/dKxUI.jpg

true

 

I blame the proliferation of HR departments doing the hiring. If you don't have the right keywords, they will bypass you even if you're a viable candidate. That's why it's always good to ask if you can talk to members of the team. If they're working over 50 hours a week and you semi-know what you're talking about, they will demand that HR hire you.

 

Or you can search through your pro-social hobbies for both references and skill-sets. My marketing experience as a semi-indie writer has helped me fill out softer skills, while still letting me have fun at conventions.

 

 

 

This is very true about HR departments

 

The primary way to combat this is to list project experience rather than or as well as work experience, especially for professional jobs. There's a reason schools try to assign you four or five group projects in your academic career. Those projects are resume fodder that can provide you the keywords and experience to get hired. And always try to keep in contact with one or two of your project partners. Those will be excellent references who are not related to you and have first-hand knowledge of your work ethic, which is what employers really want to know from references. 

 

Businesses are project-oriented nowadays. They would rather know specific cases where you have used your skills, because that is more believable than generic phrases by a job title.

To be born is to be handed a death sentence.

Nice.

If I can't enter an exit then why does the door open when I try to enter the exit. 

No one goes to that bar, because it's too busy.

the more you fail, the more likely you are to succeed 

labels that say don't try this at home

IM NEVER DRUNK BECAUSE BEER IS IN MY BLOOD

Light speed is 186284 miles per second and no matter how far it travels, it finds dark got their first.

time is money, but unemployed people have all the time in the world but no money 

"Money for nothing. That's the way you do it. And the chicks are free."

"Money for nothing. That's the way you do it. And the chicks are free."

lol

Proton's have mass. I didn't realize they had religious affiliation.

your skin burns when its really cold

The Egg came first