683 replies to this topic

[RearviewRover]

This is a thread I've seen on several alliance forums. The rules are simple. In each reply, you will corrupt the wish of the person above you by granting it, but in a devious manner, and then make a wish of your own. Let's see how creative we can get.

Person 1: "I wish I had a million bucks."

Person 2: "Granted, but all.the bills are stolen and you're going to prison."

To start things off, I wish I had a homemade apple pie right now.

[Robert2424]

Granted, but it was poisoned and now you die.

I wish to be a super hero with healing powers that heals pretty much anything. Physical, mental, or illness.

[Balacenia]

Granted, but you can only heal animals.

 

I wish for always perfect teeth

[Kitkat16]

Granted. Lolol. You get them, but have to spend five years in braces first. (Take it from one who knows. Braces suck.)

 

I wish for contentment and appreciation of what I already have (such that lack of riches or successful career or good health will not make me discontent.)

[RearviewRover]

Granted, but contentment eventually develops into apathy, you lose your job, your house and vehicle are repossessed, and you become a smelly, unkempt bum who sleeps in garbage cans.

I wish I owned my own barbecue pit.

[captainjf]

Granted, but it is a small portable, .33m^3 one.

 

I wish I was physically fit.

[Robert2424]

Granted, but soon after your hit by a car you never saw knocking you out and both your legs are broken.

I wish my dad wasn't such a chump.

[RearviewRover]

Granted, but now he never believes anything anybody tells him, regardless of how true and/or believable it is.

I wish I didn't have to go work tomorrow.

[captainjf]

Granted, but know you are broke and can't do anything else.

 

I wish I could paint my warhammer 40k models.

[MrFinch]

Granted. Any paint you use comes out as yellow-orange. Doesn't matter the color you think you are using, it is always yellow-orange.

 

I wish my cat wouldn't sit on my keyboard as I'm typing.

[Balacenia]

Granted, but your cat has died due to being hit by a car.

 

I wish I had a perfect memory

[RearviewRover]

Granted, but now you constantly remember everything you wish you could forget.

I wish I had a pizza bar at my place.

[MrFinch]

Granted, but the only toppings are lutefisk, spinach, dry dog food & government cheese slices.

 

I wish I could have a full tank of gas in my SUV at all times.

[Balacenia]

Granted, but you have lost your ability to drive.

 

I wish I had a second monitor

[RearviewRover]

Granted, but it only displays a perpetually frozen Internet Explorer page.

I wish I owned a pet Alaskan Malamute.

[Tom Foolery]

Granted, but its part wolf and will eventually kill you.

 

I wish I had a vast, private collection of fine scotch 

[RearviewRover]

Granted, but a bum breaks into your house, drinks all of it, and passes out naked in your bed.

I wish IRC hadn't died.

[King Cankles]

Granted, but now it's filled with nothing but furry role players.


I wish I could change into a transformer.

[Euphorical]

Granted, but it's made of scrap metal.

I wish I had an display picture.

[King Cankles]

Granted, but it's a picture of me. Naked.

I wish I had bigger Cankles