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Relationship Ends 3 years

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After three long beautiful and hard years. My lady finally called it quits but would like to remain friends. I thought it would hurt me more but to tell you the truth i'm actually quite happy. Is that wrong to feel this way?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DY7I6QdPkYU

 

To Live (Vivere)
 
What a magnificent day
what a day to celebrate
my girl has left me
I'm free at last!
 
I've got my life back
and I intend to enjoy it.
when she left she said she wouldn't come back
 
Now I can live without misery
live without jealousy
with no regrets
with no concerns about love
 
I can enjoy the flowers, enjoy life
and still my feelings
 
I can laugh and be happy
I can laugh at a foolish world
I can live while I am still young
because life is beautiful
and I want to live more of it
 
Women want you to act in 
in the comedy of love
they want you to play the 
romantic lead
but when the curtain comes down in act 3
your faced with reality
Her romantic drama is a farce
 
Live! even if you feel a little nostalgic
I'm not bitter any more
I'm happy for the guy who took her away
To live while I'm young 
Because life is beautiful

Take my advice here.  Get as far away from her as you can for now.  You feel fine because you still talk everyday.  Once that stops you are going to be miserable.  Best to do it on your own terms and adjust to her not being around all of the time, than for waiting for her to spring it on you.  I've had this happen.  Was in a relationship for 3 and  half years and my ex and I split.  We talked everyday, until she started dating someone else and then we didn't speak again for nearly a year, and for a solid three months I was completely miserable.

Well remaining friends can or can't work.

IE: I don't even talk to my most recent ex. Nor do I have any desire to. She wanted to remain friends, but I chose not to.

However, I had a fiance before that. Things didn't work out and the break up was a nightmare. But he's now married and has a kid. We are still friends.

 

It all really depends on how well the two of you can accept the change.

After three long beautiful and hard years. My lady finally called it quits but would like to remain friends. I thought it would hurt me more but to tell you the truth i'm actually quite happy. Is that wrong to feel this way?

Well it's good that you are happy, and I don't think yous should feel as though that is wrong...

 

Yeah thanks mate but we still talk every day like it's nothing.

If it's just talking to you then it's not a problem. Just make sure you both keep each other in the friend  zone. The waters get rough when it gets all muddied. 

After three long beautiful and hard years. My lady finally called it quits but would like to remain friends. I thought it would hurt me more but to tell you the truth i'm actually quite happy. Is that wrong to feel this way?

 

No. Whatever feelings you have are valid. Whether you remain friends or not is up to how you feel. Honestly, whether people can remain friends afterwards or not depends on how the break up ended. Sometimes relationships just end because there simply isn't much left to it anymore.

 

Enjoy whatever comes next.

After three long beautiful and hard years. My lady finally called it quits but would like to remain friends. I thought it would hurt me more but to tell you the truth i'm actually quite happy. Is that wrong to feel this way?

 

 

It's nice that you feel that way.  I usually never felt that way, but then again I am the type that tried to keep things going and work on things and usually was the one who go dumped which always hit me a bit hard.

  • Author

As am I Rhizo but she pretty much had her mine made up so I was eh what the hell. I can say i'm not interested into rushing into another relationship right now. Some telling me it's going hurt eventually but right now I can't honestly tell. I occupy my time being more active on forums here and playing the game. I do prefer company though pure silence is like death to me. So anybody and everybody feel free to add me and msg me. :)

As am I Rhizo but she pretty much had her mine made up so I was eh what the hell. I can say i'm not interested into rushing into another relationship right now. Some telling me it's going hurt eventually but right now I can't honestly tell. I occupy my time being more active on forums here and playing the game. I do prefer company though pure silence is like death to me. So anybody and everybody feel free to add me and msg me. :)

 

 

 

After three long beautiful and hard years. My lady finally called it quits but would like to remain friends. I thought it would hurt me more but to tell you the truth i'm actually quite happy. Is that wrong to feel this way?

 

 

It's nice that you feel that way.  I usually never felt that way, but then again I am the type that tried to keep things going and work on things and usually was the one who go dumped which always hit me a bit hard.

 

 

 

I am similar to you two but Lost Assassin handled it correctly. I have tried to keep fighting when the other person was clearly wanting to end it. If you want to stay on good terms with the person when their mind is clearly made up, you have to let go. If you try to fight when the other person doesn't have any interest, you will only end up destroying what remains.

 

I have learned that lesson the hard way. Persistence can be a powerful trait but the flip side is knowing when to let go, when to stop pushing and when to find other things to distract yourself from it.

After three long beautiful and hard years. My lady finally called it quits but would like to remain friends. I thought it would hurt me more but to tell you the truth i'm actually quite happy. Is that wrong to feel this way?

I've watched people fight on with relationships because they still love each other but are clearly not in the end compatible, and without realising they have built up an incredible amount of stress and anger at the other person. When that type of relationship ends the stress and anger goes, and it can lead to the person feeling happier. It doesn't mean they don't love the other person, it doesn't mean they hadn't had happy times in the relationship, but it is a sign that moving on is for the best before they start to hate each other. 

 

I am not saying this is what has happened in your case. But it might be something to think about (if you want to) as it might help you understand yourself. It might not and it might be completely inaccurate, but I thought I would leave it there anyway. 

 

In anycase, I hope you continue to feel well and I wish you well with your future. 

  • Author

Thank You Icewolf for joining in on the topic. At first I was trying to find a reason why we should stay together but all honesty I knew it was time to move on. Only thing that was bothering me was that "what if" bug. So I got some repel spray and moving on. :)

  • 7 months later...

It is quite normal to feel happy. I bet you feel more of a relieve.

 

Usually, men feel happy during the first days of the break-up, but they will feel desperate several months after the break-up. Women experience otherwise.

  • 1 year later...

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