granted but it's 2 years old

 

I wish for a better lighter...

Granted, but it comes with no lighter fluid and non-refillable

 

I wish that this world had more redheads

granted, but the azns will take over the world.

 

i wish for a wife with red hair

granted but she is wearing a wig...

 

I wish for me to be able speak French better...

Granted but no one ever talks to you in French ever again

 

I wish I had a steak right now

Granted but its tough as nails

 

I wish I would kick Spencer Pratt's ass

Granted but he punches your face, kicks your nuts, slams down on your shins and throws you clear across the street

 

I wish I didn't have any hw tonight

granted but you get a project which is due tommorrow

 

I wish for something to do

Granted, but it's shoveling horse manure

 

I wish it was easier to get abs

granted, but you have skinny arms

 

i wish for a dumbell

Granted but it weighs a ton

 

I wish i know how to speak japanese.

Granted but you get stranded in Ukraine and Japanese won't help you get back home from there.

 

I wish I was as good as math as a Hungarian.

granted, but your english sucks

 

i wish for breakfast

Granted but its two week old oatmeal

 

I wish for infinate courage.

granted, but you also get stinky feet

 

i wish for cookies!

Granted but they are earwax flavored

 

I wish I had free rent

Granted, but your pad is a shanty made of corrugated metal on an empty lot with no utilities.

 

I wish I could shoot three pointers in basketball much better.

granted, but you can no longer shoot a 2 pointer

 

i wish for new skis

Granted but they are backwords

 

I wish for plane tickets...

granted but there will be 1000 layovers

Granted, your wish for nothing makes you never exist.

 

I wish for a new pair of shoes.

granted but they have holes in them

 

I wish for a wish

Granted but it's a corrupted wish

 

I wish for food...

granted but it gives you the craps

 

i wish for a dragon

Granted but you get 2 that won't stop eating

 

I wish for monster energy drinks