granted, but you can only afford bad music no one likes anyway

 

i wish the bruise on my hand would heal before tomorrow

Granted, your hand disappears. Bruise is gone.

 

I wish I had a brand new car. BMW preferably.

Granted, you'll find your brand new BMW has been wrecked right outside your domicile.

 

 

I wish I had a million dollars.

granted, in some obscure currency that's only with pennies and it cant even buy you a loaf of bread.

 

i wish for a yumm sandwich with health benefits and barbeque sauce

granted but it has human body parts in it

 

i wish to learn how to speak german

Glückwünsche können Sie Deutsches sprechen. Unfortunatle vergessen Sie, wie man Englisch spricht.

 

I wish I could go to Niagra Falls again.

granted but while you are there you come down with a bad cold and are stuck inside the whole time feeling like you are going to die

By not wishing for anything, Phish, you only wind up angering the thread gods and all sorts of crazy bad fortune befall you.

 

I wish this weather would clear up.

granted, but there is a bad smell in the air now

 

i wish for money

Granted, and you are immediately arrested and jailed for robbery.

 

I wish I had a pizza.

granted, you now own a pizza, thats not the other side of the world. now for $5 you can pay for postage and handling, and you'll receive it in the next month.

 

i wish my quads didnt hurt

Granted... you step on a land mine; they aren't attached to you any more, so they aren't "hurting", per se.

 

I wish this cold would go away.

granted, but you get a fever instead

 

i wish for a new radio

Granted, you get an old barely working one from a thrift store. Hey, it's new to you.

 

I wish my car could be repaired to look brand new.

Granted, it looks brand new but it never will run like new ever again.

 

I wish for a car loan to buy this used BMW I saw.

granted in the fine print of the loan the interest rate doubles every hour

 

I wish I had 1 million US dollars

Granted, but the government takes 95% of it in taxes to pay for socialized medicine.

 

I wish I had another beer. Oh wait, I have a 30 rack.

 

Umm...

 

I wish I had a banana.

granted. you develop a phobia for bananas though and hurl it out the window, at a police car and you get arrested

 

i wish for great fortune and happiness for the person who posts after me in this, regardless of what harm befalls me (:

granted, but you feel like crap for doing it

 

i wish for an xmas tree

granted it is the nicest xmas tree that you have ever seen but after you have it set up in your house and all decorated it catches fire and burns down your house

 

I wish for a white turkey day

I wish for a white turkey day

 

granted, then all the black turkies are pissed and call you racist, then burn your house down

granted, then all the black turkies are pissed and call you racist, then burn your house down

 

You uh...failed to wish for anything there. I'm afraid you just killed the thread. Way to go.

 

I wish this guy hadn't failed so hard.

granted instead you are the one who failed

 

I wish I had a rancor I could have attack people whenever I wanted to

granted but then your rancor met Luke Skywalker.

 

I wish that is wasn't raining.

granted, but now it is sleeting

 

I wish I was on a tropical beach